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Blonde Jokes

From Suzanne Somers as Chrissy on Threes Company to Heather Morris portrayal of Brittany on Glee, the blond joke has been a perennial favorite of joke writers and tellers for decades. Sure, its a wild-eyed stereotype and many blondes, such as Marilyn Monroe only played dumb. Still blonde jokes endure, largely because they are prototypical humor a strong storyline thats easy to follow (unless youre blonde), a great set up, and a zinger of a punch line. Few jokes are as endearing and enduring as blonde jokes. Now what were we saying?

Reference.com Definition of Blonde
Blonde on Wikipedia.org

Found 50 jokes in the topic of Blonde.
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30
30

"What did the blonde say when she opened the box of Cheerios?
"Oh, look, Daddy ... doughnut seeds.""

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8
8

"Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?
She didn't want to wake up the sleeping pills."

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7
7

"Three women are about to be executed. One's a brunette, one's a redhead, and one's a blond. Two guards brings the brunette forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.
She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ." Suddenly the brunette yells, "earthquake!!" Everyone is startled and looks around. She manages to escape. The angry guards then bring the redhead forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.
She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ." The redhead then screams, "tornado!!" Yet again, everyone is startled and looks around. She too escapes execution. By this point, the blonde had figured out what the others did. The guards bring her forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.
She also says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."
The blond shouts, "fire!!""

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5
5

"One day a blonde was having trouble with her computer, so she calls tech support.
"Hello how can I help you?" the tech support woman says.
"Yes, I am having trouble getting my computer to do anything," the blonde says.
"Do you have any windows open?"
"Are you crazy? it's freezing cold outside!""

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4
4

"A blonde walks into the library. She walks up to the counter, SLAMS a book down and screams at the librarian, "This is the WORST book I've ever read! It has NO plot and far too many characters!"
The librarian looks up and calmly remarks, "So, you're the one who took our phone book.""

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1
1

"One day a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead were being chased by the police. The girls decided to go up 3 different trees to hide. The brunette hid in an apple tree, the redhead hid in a lemon tree, and the blonde hid in an oak tree. The policeman went to the apple tree and said, Is there anyone up there?"
The brunette went, "meow."
The policeman said to himself, "Oh, it s just a cat stuck up in a tree."
Then he went over to the lemon tree and said, "Is there anyone up there?"
The redhead went, "bark, bark."
The policeman said to himself, "Oh, it s just a dog stuck up in a tree!"
Then he went over to the oak tree and said, "Is there anyone up there?"
And the Blonde said, "Acorn, acorn!""

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Featured Book: The Most Brilliant Thoughts of All Time (In Two Lines or Less) by John M. Shanahan

You don't have to be a genius to sound like one. Here's a collection of the most profound and provocative wit and wisdom in the English language in two lines or less. Edited by entrepreneur John M. Shanahan, who created the wildly successful Hooked on Phonics program, this wonderful book presents the best that has been thought and said on every imaginable topic.

1
1

"There was a brunette walking on a railroad track saying, " 22, 22, 22, 22..."
A blonde walking near-by heard the brunette. So, the blonde asked if she could join the brunette.
The brunette said sure and together they said, " 22, 22, 22, 22 &"
Later on a train comes down the track. The brunette jumps off, but the blonde is not so lucky.
The brunette jumped back on the track after the train was gone and started saying, "23, 23, 23, 23...""

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