"If you are going through hell, keep going."
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Winston_Churchill
"The difference between school and life? In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson."
"Life is too important to be taken seriously."
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oscar_Wilde
"A word to the wise ain't necessary, it's the stupid ones who need the advice."
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bill_Cosby
"You grow up the day you have your first real laugh -- at yourself."
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ethel_Barrymore
"Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed."
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arthur_Schopenhauer
"If you're going to tell people the truth, be funny or they'll kill you."
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billy_Wilder
"The difference between life and the movies is that a script has to make sense, and life doesn't."
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_L._Mankiewicz
"Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else."
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judy_Garland
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robin_Williams
"I think fooseball is a combination of soccer and shishkabobs."
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mitch_Hedberg
"Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed."
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Albert_Einstein
"I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself."
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Johnny_Carson
"It's not true I had nothing on, I had the radio on."
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_Monroe
"Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin .. it's the triumphant twang of a bedspring."