Please do not visit, its a trap for bots
1FunnyQuotes.com
1FunnyQuotes.com

Funny Quotes

Found 4,706 quotes in the topic of Funny.
[ Page 1 of 236 ]
.
"The difference between school and life? In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson."
Tom Bodett
Are you sure you'd like to delete this document?
  • Comment
  • Add Topic
  • Press CTRL + C to copy code to your clipboard.
    <EMBED>
American Author Education Funny inspirational Life
.
"Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin .. it's the triumphant twang of a bedspring."
J. Perelman
Funny Love Quote of the Day
Arthur Schopenhauer
"Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed."
Arthur Schopenhauer
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arthur_Schopenhauer
Birthday Funny German Philosopher
Robin Williams
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."
Robin Williams
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robin_Williams
American Comedian Funny
.
"If you're going to tell people the truth, be funny or they'll kill you."
Billy Wilder
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billy_Wilder
American Director Funny inspirational Life
Marilyn Monroe
"It's not true I had nothing on, I had the radio on."
Marilyn Monroe
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_Monroe
American Actress Funny Quote of the Day Short Funny Top Funny

Featured Book: The Most Brilliant Thoughts of All Time (In Two Lines or Less) by John M. Shanahan

You don't have to be a genius to sound like one. Here's a collection of the most profound and provocative wit and wisdom in the English language in two lines or less. Edited by entrepreneur John M. Shanahan, who created the wildly successful Hooked on Phonics program, this wonderful book presents the best that has been thought and said on every imaginable topic.
Oscar Wilde
"Life is too important to be taken seriously."
Oscar Wilde
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oscar_Wilde
Funny Importance Irish Dramatist Life
.
"Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else."
Judy Garland
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judy_Garland
American Actress Funny inspirational Motivational
.
"A true friend remembers your birthday but not your age."
Source Unknown
Birthday Friends Or Friendship Funny
Mitch Hedberg
"I think fooseball is a combination of soccer and shishkabobs."
Mitch Hedberg
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mitch_Hedberg
Funny
Add "Funny Quote of the Day" to your site in just seconds!
.
"I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant."
Robert McCloskey
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_McCloskey
American Author Communication Funny inspirational Life
Rodney Dangerfield
"I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet."
Rodney Dangerfield
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rodney_Dangerfield
American Comedian Funny
Albert Einstein
"Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed."
Albert Einstein
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Albert_Einstein
Funny Love Marriage Men Men And Women Women
Bill Cosby
"A word to the wise ain't necessary, it's the stupid ones who need the advice."
Bill Cosby
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bill_Cosby
Funny inspirational Life Motivational
.
"I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself."
Johnny Carson
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Johnny_Carson
American Comedian Death Funny
.
"The difference between life and the movies is that a script has to make sense, and life doesn't."
Joseph Mankiewicz
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_L._Mankiewicz
Editor's Pick Funny Life Quote of the Day
P. J. O'Rourke
"Earnestness is stupidity sent to college."
P. J. O'Rourke
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/P._J._O%27Rourke
American Comedian College Funny
.
"When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking."
Elayne Boosler
American Comedian Country Funny Quote of the Day
.
"James Caan told me at the end of filming 'Elf' that he had been waiting through the whole film for me to be funny - and I never was."
Will Ferrell
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Will_Ferrell
American Comedian Funny
.
"You grow up the day you have your first real laugh -- at yourself."
Ethel Barrymore
Wikipedia -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ethel_Barrymore
Character Funny Life Motivational Quote of the Day

You'll also like:

Funny American Comedian
Funny Love
Funny Irish Comedian
Funny Editor's Pick
Funny Top Funny
Short Funny Top Funny
Funny inspirational
Funny Motivational
Motivational inspirational
Funny Age And Aging
Funny Short Funny
Birthday Life
Funny Life
Funny Birthday
Funny British Comedian
Funny Friends Or Friendship
Life inspirational

Topics you may be interested in:

Recommended

Funny Quotes Categories

Submit Your Quotes!

Joke Categories

About 1FunnyQuotes.com

1FunnyQuotes.com is your number one site for funny quotes. 1FunnyQuotes.com was founded in August of 2011 and has since grown to a collection over 10,000 funny quotes!

"Quotes that will make you laugh."

Copyright © 2011 1FunnyQuotes.com